


Lysis

by ieatbabywipes



Category: My Hero Academia
Genre: A pinch of smut, Angst, Angst with no happy ending, Childhood Friends, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, It’s just Izuku jacking off, M/M, Memory Loss, Out of Character, Pro Hero Bakugo, Purgatory, Quirkless Midoriya Izuku, You Decide, college student Izuku Midoriya, first post here so BE NICE, ghost Bakugo Katsuki, no beta we die like men, only a little tho, well kind of a happy ending?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-26
Updated: 2020-11-26
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:15:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27720575
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ieatbabywipes/pseuds/ieatbabywipes
Summary: The sun rises and falls sixteen times before something happens again.It's the woman again, with a smaller vacuum in her hand, along with a manila folder full of papers. Katsuki watches as she walks around the apartment and cleans up the dead bugs and cobwebs lying around, and leaves the manila folder on the granite countertop after she leaves.The sun sets, and soon after it rises, Katsuki's life changes.OrKatsuki is a ghost haunting an apartment that Izuku moves into after a year of being empty.
Relationships: Bakugou Katsuki/Midoriya Izuku
Comments: 17
Kudos: 97





	Lysis

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone and welcome to my first ever post on here! Ahaha yeah I’ve posted on Wattpad for the past six years, so I figured it was time for a change. This is a pretty sad one-shot that I rewrote like three times. It still doesn’t feel completely right, but omg I still love how it turned out! Thanks for reading, guys :D

The apartment is silent, as it usually is, and has been for a long time.

And Katsuki lies in the center of the empty living room, and has been for a long time.

He's learned over the course of a year that in order to stay sane in his mind, he's forced to cut off his thinking. The need for some stimulation is constantly bothering him, turning his insides out, and making him want to pull his hair out. Which he's done, by the way, but it's always grown back within the next instant.

He's pulled off the clothes on his body and watched them materialize back onto his frame. He's bent his finger back so far that it snaps, but by the time he blinks, the pain and disfigurement is gone, and he's once again engulfed in a solemn emptiness.

If you're immortal, you're luckier than him. Because at least for a while you're happy or have something to look forward to in life. You may start a family, kiss your wife goodbye, hug your children, go to the store. At least you're seen by people.

But for Katsuki, he's nothing but a pocket of empty space.

He is only a soul. A peaceful one that floats around the same old apartment he's lived in for two years. From what Katsuki knows, he realized he died a year ago. He had to watch his phone vibrate on his bedside, observe his body darken and bruise on his bed. Possibly the worst thing he'd have to go through was watching his mother come into his apartment four days later to find him lifeless in his room.

He tried his hardest to keep it together after that. Seeing a scene like that was an experience that had been burned into the back of his eyelids. Having to see his own body rot in his bed and be taken out on a stretcher, his mom and dad sobbing beside his body, was something that deeply affected him.

After that, it was silence for the longest time.

He sat in the middle of the living room as teams of people moved the furniture out of the space. He watched them take the food in his cupboards, wrap up his mattress, disinfect, and disappear. Even now, the compressions in the carpet of where the pegs of his couch once stood were still visible.

There was the same dead cockroach sitting in his bathroom. It was always dark, except for the sun streaming through the blinds. And Katsuki, man, he's just waiting desperately for something to happen.

He's thought about a lot of things. He sits out on the empty balcony sometimes, and when he falls from atop the railing, he gets placed right back into the same apartment. He's wondered if this is Hell. Or if it's Heaven. Or if it's purgatory, or if it's just what happens to everyone when they die. He's thinking, and he's thinking. Perhaps this is purgatory. Perhaps this is his punishment for being a shitty person to the kids in his grade. There are so many things that could've happened.

But these thoughts are just thoughts. They kind of trail off from there, and so Katsuki has learned how to ignore them.

He's lying in the middle of the living room when something finally happens.

The door opens and there's a couple of people chattering to each other, one of them being a retail woman dressed in a pencil skirt and blazer. The other is a young man with bright eyes and an even brighter smile, looking around the apartment with very obvious interest. He's nodding along to what she's saying before interrupting her excitedly.

"The carpeting and paint is brand new, since no one has lived here sinc-"

"I want it! I'm getting this place." He says, beaming smile incredibly bright. The woman looks at him with shocked delight, tilting her head. "Alright, then! Well let's look around and we can discuss prices, shall we?" She says politely, and he nods like a puppy, allowing her to guide him around the small apartment.

They leave after an hour. Katsuki, now intrigued, waits.

The sun rises and falls sixteen times before something happens again.

It's the woman again, with a smaller vacuum in her hand, along with a manila folder full of papers. Katsuki watches as she walks around the apartment and cleans up the dead bugs and cobwebs lying around, and leaves the manila folder on the granite countertop after she leaves.

The sun sets, and soon after it rises, Katsuki's life changes.

_________________

Katsuki watches the boy walk around the apartment, carefully placing a long leaved plant on the table in front of the window. He's sitting on the couch. Not like it matters where he sits, but he decides that it's only natural now that there's furniture here.

The entire day of the move-in, Katsuki was sure he was crying the whole time. Maybe it was relief, sadness, fear? Or perhaps all three. He's not sure he was even crying at all. All he knows is that now he has someone to hang onto, even if it's just him watching.

The boy sighs, stretching his back and plopping down onto the couch. His body goes right through Katsuki's, so he stands up and takes a seat on the edge of the coffee table in front of the boy.

The intrusive noise of a ringtone startles Katsuki more than anything.

"Do not fear, for I am here!" The phone yells, and the green boy reaches over and answers the call. He decides to put it on speaker as he leans his back against the couch once more, sighing in content as a peppy female voice comes through the phone.

"'Zuku! How are you? How's the move been? Are you hungry? We could get somet-"

"Ochaco, chill! I'm fine. I just finished moving my stuff up here. It takes a lot out of you when you have to take all of that stuff through an elevator." 'Zuku's laugh is like a chime as it echoes through the small room.

"Yeah? That's great to hear. I haven't been able to stop thinking about you." She says. Although her voice is tinny, the statement comes off as flirtatious.

'Zuku visibly blushes, covering his face with one hand as he tilts his head to the side. "Really? Me too, haha. I miss you already."

"How about we go get some udon tonight? You must be hungry after a long day." Ochaco chimes happily, and 'Zuku agrees thankfully, hanging up the phone with a timid 'see you later.'

Katsuki just watches the scene from the table, feeling like a lost puppy. He feels like he's intruding on something terribly personal, and for some reason, that thought rouses something deep inside of him.

It's a small flame, but he's sure that one day it will burn brighter.

_________________

Later that night he sits in the corner of the living room, hiding away from the sound of them having post-date sex.

_________________

After that night, Katsuki sees a lot of Ochaco around. They cook together, watch movies together, and normal date stuff. And when she isn't in the house, Izuku (Katsuki had finally learned his real name thanks to Ochaco), is usually sitting at his desk doing school work. He's a senior in college, majoring in what Katsuki guesses is quirk engineering.

Izuku is a big All Might nerd. He's passionate about hero work and quirks, although Katsuki had never seen or heard about Izuku's own quirk. He wonders what it is, if he even has one at all.

It's been several months since Izuku moved into the apartment. And while he's home, Katsuki tries to learn everything he can about him. When 'Zuku's around, he feels whole, and content, despite their severe lack of communication. Or, in this case, a one-sided knowledge of each other's existence.

Katsuki thinks about Izuku a lot when he's not home. A large part of him feels pathetic for acting as desperate as a lost puppy. But given his position, what else is he supposed to do?

_________________

Four months go by.

Until now, it was the same monotony that Katsuki had grown used to.

When Izuku walks into the house at 4:00 sharp, he drops his bag and roughly toes his shoes off. Getting up off the couch, Katsuki decides to walk over and see what's wrong. But as he does, Izuku chokes on a sob and storms right through Katsuki's body with a violent movement. He follows again, walking into the bedroom to see Izuku throwing off his clothes and rushing to the bathroom, turning on the shower's water to its hottest.

Katsuki sits on the countertop and watches as Izuku screams as loud as he can, slamming his fist into the tile wall.

There's silence afterwards. It's loaded with tension. Katsuki can taste the grief coming off of him in waves as he watches the pathetic, green-haired boy sink to the floor of the shower stall and curl into himself.

Soft, soundless feet pad to the glass barrier. His body phases through, and he kneels, hesitantly reaching out to Izuku's shoulder and pretending to pet the junction of his neck.

Izuku shivers, looking up and around him, before going back into his fetal position.

________________

After a week, Izuku returns back to normal. After the "incident," Ochaco never comes back to his apartment.

Katsuki watches Izuku sleep from the windowsill. He's leaned forward, with his elbow on his thigh and his chin rested on his palm. It's quite honestly not the most comfortable position. But Katsuki digresses, because even if he's in discomfort, it'll disappear in an instant.

He went in to watch Izuku a few hours prior because he had heard odd noises coming from his room. He walked in to find the boy rolling around his bed, his face contorted and sweaty. And so, Katsuki's been watching ever since. Not like he can do anything, but it still gives him peace of mind.

He tries to give Izuku the most privacy he can. It's the least he can do, and being nosy would for sure be the death of his very little dignity.

When the dawn sun starts to filter through the blinds, Izuku wakes up.

Katsuki watches him stretch and blink up at his phone, and feels his heart palpitate as Izuku looks straight through him at the sun filtering through the blinds. Izuku groans, quite loudly, as he rubs his face tiredly and throws his feet over the edge of the bed.

His boxers are tented severely.

Katsuki's eyes widen.

Izuku bites his lip, palming his face. "Fuck. Ochaco...," he mutters quietly, to himself almost, and Katsuki stiffens as he stands and slips his boxers down his thighs. He kicks them off as they pool around his ankles, once again sitting on the edge of the bed with a sad look on his face.

Izuku's cock is really nice. It's so fucking nice. And Katsuki, man, he wants to leave, but he can't help but stay when Izuku grabs himself and starts to pump his length slowly. He jumps as Izuku stands from the bed, pressing himself against the wall next to Katsuki. He trusts his hips into the air, fucking his hand, as he sinks his own teeth into the soft freckled flesh of his forearm.

He cums soon afterwards, panting as he watches the white fluid drip down the wall.

A look of despair floods his face, creasing his eyebrows together.

"Disgusting."

_________________

Izuku stumbles into the house at 11pm.

Drunkenly, he points a finger to Katsuki, who had been sitting on the couch at the time of his arrival.

"You! What the FUCK are you doing in my house?" He screams, trembling. And Katsuki stares at him with wide eyes, his hands shaking as he slowly approaches Izuku.

"You can see me?" He inwardly cringes at how his voice croaks from disuse.

Izuku stands in the doorway, something dawning on his face, and suddenly he looks like he's about to be sick.

"Y-you're. You're Ground Zero. Why is a dead hero in my house? Why-" Izuku chokes, clutching his head in his hands. "I drank too much. I'm sitting down. This isn't real."

Katsuki watches him fall asleep on the couch, and vigilantly stays up until he wakes in the morning.

He cannot stop thinking about what he'd said.

"You're Ground Zero. Why is a dead hero in my house?"

________________

The first thing Izuku does when he wakes up is run to the kitchen sink and vomit like his life depended on it.

The second thing Izuku does when he wakes up is stare at Katsuki from across the room, still sitting in the same position he assumed when Izuku fell asleep.

"So I wasn't hallucinating."

Katsuki's confused, but it manifests into anger. "The fuck is that supposed to mean?" He's still cringing at his rough voice. He sounds like he hasn't spoken in a year... Which was, well, it was true.

Izuku, oddly enough, smiles widely. His pearly teeth shine, even in the dimness of the apartment.

He waltzes over to the couch and sits across from Katsuki.

"I bought this place because of its history." Izuku says, incredibly vaguely, and it leaves Katsuki's head spinning. Though, he decides to sit patiently and listen.

"The Pro Hero Ground Zero died here a year and a half ago." Izuku scratches the back of his head. Katsuki becomes increasingly more confused.

"I can see you now. I guess I went out last night, and met a guy who told me that his quirk allowed the people he touched to see ghosts. It's always been something on my mind. You. I've wondered if your soul was still here in this place, and that's why I accepted it. That, and because I was incredibly drunk. It worked though!" Izuku beams, his cheeks flushing a healthy red.

"Who is Ground Zero?"

Izuku stills, looking at him from behind his long bangs.

"You don't remember who you are?"

Katsuki freezes, and thinks the hardest he can. To no avail. He shakes his head.

Izuku, for the first time, looks at him with incredible concern. Those viridian eyes look like they're trying to dig into his very soul, trying to reach and touch every string of his consciousness. Out of everything Katsuki has been through in the past year, he feels like this is the scariest part.

After a moment, Izuku leans back into the couch.

"It's okay. I wouldn't expect you to remember everything. You're a ghost, after all."

Katsuki inwardly seethes at the statement.

Izuku sighs, placing his hands into his lap. "You've been an inspiration of mine since I was a teenager. Your attitude, your problem solving, your loyalty... It made me want to be the best version of myself." He smiles sadly, eyes downcast and dark like a sinkhole.

"I couldn't ever be a hero, though. Because I'm quirkless. And All Might himself told me that I could never be one." He hides his face and the incoming tears, almost shyly, even though Katsuki has seen him do much worse.

"So here I am. Studying quirk engineering. Someday I would like to create prototype gadgets for heroes, and work in the support gear industry." He looks at Katsuki, gaze watery and foreign.

"It's so sad you had to die. I was heartbroken when I heard the news. Your cause of death was never revealed to the public. But I guess the time is the time, no matter how strong you are." Izuku continues, smiling weakly to Katsuki. He feels his heart melt a little bit.

Katsuki sighs, mulling over the new information in his head. "You don't have to have a quirk to be the best version of yourself, dumbass. Do you know what being yourself is?" He asks, letting his gaze smolder Izuku from the inside out. He shakes his head slowly, an invitation to continue.

"It's accepting all of your parts. Your good ones, your bad ones. The ones you're ashamed of and the ones you wished you had. I... Fuck, in my life I hated so many parts of myself. But the only reason why I was able to grow was because I fucking realized what my shit qualities were and fixed them. I also... I accepted parts of myself that I hated. Like my sexuality. I fucking hated myself for being gay, but. God, I was just able to accept it and move on." Katsuki looks back to Izuku and sees something beautiful.

A bloom of vibrant viridian. Irises wobbling like a funhouse mirror. A bloom of color that reminded Katsuki of moss and seaweed. Puffed out cheeks that were shining with tears, and that were red and angry from the crying. The freckles stood out on the reddened skin, making Katsuki fall so much deeper.

He sniffs loudly, swiping his arm across his nose. "Sorry, sorry. I'm sorry. I just really needed that- No one's ever said that before, and coming from you it-" He interrupts himself with a deep breath, his rigid body deflating as he continues to swipe at his eyes with his hands. He looks up at Katsuki again. "Thank you." He smiles widely.

Katsuki smiles back.

__________________

The same day, Katsuki watches as Izuku takes off his shirt, preparing for bed.

One of the first things he noticed about Izuku is the amount of scars he had all over his body. They were on his hands, his arms, his back. And Katsuki - he wonders. Where did they come from?

"Where did you get so many scars?" He asks, and Izuku freezes.

It's later in the evening. The bumbling city outside of the window is quiet, and the sky is dark, as is the bedroom. There's the exception of the bedside lamp, bathing half the room in a yellow light. It creates a stark contrast against Izuku's skin, highlighting his scarred chest, and creating a golden halo of the hairs on the edges of his head.

Katsuki moves from his position at the foot of the bed to the windowsill on the left of Izuku.

He's still standing, vigilantly, and the tug of his teeth against his pink lips gives away his anxiety. Katsuki attempts to backtrack.

"You don't have to... If you don't want to."

"No, no. It's fine. I can tell you." He says, sitting on the edge of the bed in only his gray sweatpants.

He puts his head down, resting his cheek against his palm.

"They're from a lot of things. I used to train a lot and ended up hurting myself. And, I guess a few of them were from school. I was... I was bullied." He says, holding up his right hand to Katsuki. There's two large scars - one on the junction between his thumb and pointer finger, and one on the outside of his hand, extending below the knuckle of his pinkie.

"Some jackass pulled a knife on me. That's how I got these."

Katsuki stares at the scars, the skin there white and taut. He feels the flame in his heart grow a little brighter as he attempts to reach out and brush his fingers against the skin.

He can't help his disappointment when his hand phases right through.

Izuku lets out a small huff from his nose, accompanied by a wobbly smile. "I never took you to be such a gentle person." Izuku says. And honestly, Katsuki doesn't either. He doesn't remember much of himself before he died. The entire hero part is missing, which he guesses was a big part of his life, because he can't even remember elementary school.

"I don't remember who I was, or what I looked like." Katsuki says, and it sounds terribly empty.

Izuku looks up at him through the dark fringe of his hair, tilting his head slightly.

"You're different."

Katsuki feels anger bubbling in his stomach at the obvious statement. He clenches his hands, gnawing at his lip. "It's not like I want to be. I never chose this." He spits quietly, though he notices that Izuku isn't phased by it.

A pregnant silence. A sigh of the air conditioning.

"Kacchan..." Izuku says, almost inaudibly.

Katsuki freezes, his heart stutters, and his head pounds with heat and emotion.

"Kacchan...?"

__________________

The snow falls gently though the air, the frozen water melting on Katsuki's extended tongue. He pops his hands and watches as the snowfall withers and skates around the small explosions.

He turns to Deku, who's sitting next to him and whimsically looking at the sparks flying from his hands.

"We're gonna be the best hero duo together once I get my quirk!" Deku says, like a broken record. And for once, Katsuki's ego stays in one place as the words come from his mouth.

At this point, it's something that will absolutely happen. No matter what.

__________________

Katsuki sits on the side of Deku's bed, looking at his freshly stitched up hand.

He pets the soft skin beneath his fingers, being careful to avoid the tender flesh that had been slashed with a knife just a day prior in Aldera's schoolyard.

Deku pulls his hand away, wrapping it up with gauze again, and looks at Katsuki expectantly.

"I know you didn't just come here for that, Kacchan." He says, sharply, and Katsuki makes an ugly face.

He snarls, clenching his fists angrily. "You're a week into sixth grade and you've already been slashed by a knife. What the fuck am I supposed to do about it? Huh, you nerd? Do you fucking know how shit it's gonna be for you when I go to high school next year?"

Deku sighs heavily, palming at his forehead. "Kacchan, you don't have to do anything about it. This isn't your battle to fight - it's mine. I stopped caring about the stuff they would say to me about being quirkless-"

Katsuki puts his hand over his mouth, but quickly takes it away as he stands in front of him, looking down.

"That is not my concern, Deku." He seethes.

"My concern is that you'll be in fucking trouble, and I won't be able to help you! That's fucking it! How are we supposed to be fucking heroes together one day if you can't even take a fight?" Katsuki is furious, pacing the room in front of Izuku like a madman.

Izuku doesn't understand.

He doesn't know the extent of his dream, of his goal. Fuck being a hero. He won't be a hero unless Deku is right there by his side.

__________________

Katsuki ignores the sound of Deku's body slamming into the grass.

"Really? I pushed you once, Deku."

Izuku lets out a strangled cry as he wobbles up back to his feet.

"K-Kacchan, I really don't see the poin-" Katsuki's anger boils over suddenly, causing him to snap violently. He stomps over to Izuku and grabs him by the collar of his shirt, trying to ignore the way Deku's lips tremble.

"I have a FUCKING month to give you the goddamn balls you need in order to fucking protect yourself at SCHOOL.I won't ever fucking see you again after this, shitty Deku. I won't be here to coddle you, or find you sitting in the corner and bleeding out from a knife wound. I won't be able to take you to the hospital if some asshole decides to try to ruin your life again. Do you understand? Am I clear?" He's yelling now, furiously.

Izuku lets out a sob as Katsuki pushes him roughly away with the palm of his hand, watching the weaker boy stumble backwards.

"I don't WANT you to get hurt, but there's NOTHING I CAN DO ABOUT IT!" Katsuki sobs, curling into himself. Deku watches from a few feet away, distant yet so so close.

Katsuki looks at Izuku with watery eyes.

"This is the only thing I know I can do to protect you."

___________________

After summer ended, Katsuki moved away in order to become closer to UA. And over time, Katsuki's memory of Izuku slowly dwindled. Surrounded by new friends, the promise of a productive and fulfilling life, and a heap of praise on his plate, Katsuki had begun to forget the reason why Izuku was so important in the first place.

The light of the TV illuminates Katsuki's face a pale blue, leaving a dark shadow on the wall behind him as he watches.

"Earlier tonight in Hosu, we've received breaking news of a seventh grade student found severely injured outside the front of Aldera Junior High. He was found barely alive on the sidewalk by nearby witnesses who claimed they had seen him be pushed off the roof by two other male classmates. He is currently in critical conditio-" Katsuki turns the TV off and lies down on his bed.

He didn't need to watch any more to know the student's name.

___________________

The room is almost pitch black as the two of them lie in the bed, side by side.

"How long does the quirk's effects last?" Katsuki finally says, referencing his ability to see and hear ghosts.

The response he gets is immediate, but not something Katsuki is thrilled about.

"11:00pm. It's 10 now... so we have one hour." Izuku sighs, turning his body so that he can see Katsuki clearly. His heart drops into his stomach.

Yet, he doesn't really say anything.

"Thank you for helping me remember, Izuku" Katsuki says, breaking the still silence in between them.

"Anything for Kacchan." Comes his reply, and it's then when Katsuki realizes that Izuku had extended his hand so that it phased through his.

Katsuki can feel the corner of his lips twitch in a smile.

"I'm sorry about all the shit I did to you back then. I was a dumbass who didn't know how to handle my emotions like a normal, compassionate human being." Katuski mutters, and Izuku huffs in response. "You think I didn't know, Kacchan? You beat me up, but it was so that I could have a chance of defending myself... Those bullies were so nasty to me." He has the heart to let out a small giggle, and Katsuki swears he can feel the bed tremble beneath them.

It's followed by a sad smile.

"I wish I could've spent the rest of my life with you."

It's an unspoken thing that's always been between them. A passionate love, compassion, and empathy for the other no matter the situation. They've never really had to say it, because it was already known.

"Me too, Deku."

The white nose of the air conditioning vanishes, and that's when Katsuki can hear the faint crying coming from Izuku. He lets himself relax, smiling faintly as he closes his transparent hand into a fist.

"Hey, Deku."

"Yeah?"

"When you die, we'll both be reincarnated. You'll be a rabbit and I'll be a wolf. But the thing is, even though it's predator and prey, there will always be that link between us. So I guess maybe, despite the primal instincts, we'll be able to live together in the wild. We can both wander the world alone, but together. And when the winter gets cold, you will curl up into my side and we'll rest through the night. And in the Spring, we can play with each other in the fields and eat berries and squirrels. Does that sound good?" Katsuki questions, and he can see the shining of Deku's tears in the dim lighting of the bedroom.

He nods, his dark hair tangling against the soft pillow beneath his head.

"Yeah, that sounds good."

"I love you, Deku."

"I love you too, Kacchan."

The clock strikes 11.

_________________

Too Cute News!

3/15/2067 by Nancy Asher

Hello everyone, welcome to my blog about everything cute! Today we're going to be discussing an adorable, yet unlikely pair of animal friends spotted in a suburb near Hosu! Witnesses captured awild Gray wolf and cottontail rabbit playing together in a local park. I've attached the photos, and even a video, of their play date! I've truly never seen anything like it. It's almost like they were made to be together!

Anyways, this was a short article for today. Thanks for reading, and see you guys tomorrow!

________________

Fin.

11/25/20


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